Family Issue: Support for Those Providing Care

It can be a deeply rewarding experience to care for a friend or relative who is seriously ill. But it can also be a great challenge. Organizing your life around caregiving can leave you feeling so tired and stressed that it becomes hard to care for others or for yourself. There are places you can turn to for help, however.

Sometimes just talking things over with a sympathetic listener can be a great comfort, especially when you are burdened by negative feelings. Talking through the situation also helps you figure out what you are realistically able to do on your own and what tasks you need others to share. Some of the best people to talk to are the members of the healthcare team. With the skills and experience they bring, they can answer many of your questions and concerns.

In addition, many people who are providing care at home for someone who is seriously ill find help by joining a caregiver support group. When you share experiences with others in the same situation as yours, you are likely to feel much less alone. Ask members of the healthcare team about finding a support group. Someone on the team might also recommend a professional counselor who can help you deal with the many difficult issues faced by caregivers.

Another kind of support that many people find extremely valuable is respite care, which gives you a break from caregiving responsibilities. With respite, you can take several hours or even a few days for yourself while others see to your loved one’s care. You might be able to get respite help from family or friends as schedules permit, or you might use a more formal respite program. Hospices offer respite as part of their services, and churches and other religious organizations frequently offer respite care for their members and sometimes the community at large.

As you seek out support groups and services like respite care, you may be able to draw on other resources in your community as well, such as a local office on aging. If you can’t find a community resource on your own or with the help of the healthcare team, you can get information about local agencies from the Eldercare Locator at 800-677-1116. Resources are also available in books and on the Internet, and you can find some of these listed in the Completing a Life Resource List.